I see a German fellow has just been jailed for attempting to offload a catamaran full of illegal Chinese immigrants in Margate Harbour.
I'd be the first to condemn this sort of thing. Apparently the scumbag was charging these poor people 3,000 smackeroons apiece for the trip. And, of course, he neglected to tell them that there's a whole load more regeneration going on in China than there is in Margate. Far from bringing his human cargo to a promised land where they could savour the sweet smell of success, in actuality he was shipping them to a destination which features nothing but the foul stench of failure.
But you have to admire his ingenuity. I mean, when was the last time any sort of boat attempted to moor in the Arsonists' Playground? I wasn't aware the 'harbour' there actually contained any 'water' at all these days. Had he, in teutonically meticulous fashion, fitted wheels to his catamaran, thus inventing the caravanamaran?
I think we should be told.