What a gruelling shoot.
But the location was superb - huge mansion, overlooking the heath, with an Olympic size indoor swimming pool! They must be going for a very upmarket clientele! No wonder they wanted me to star!
Only problem was, it was blazing hot, and what with all the lights, the purrer's nests, which the props boys had carefully crafted out of Blu Tac, began to melt. And I think they'd rather overdone the scale of them, they looked more like U blockers to me.
Come to think of it, the director was a bit crabby as well, and insisted on referring to me as 'the meat puppet'. As I was leaving, he muttered something which sounded awfully like: "No matter how much I polish this turd, the stench will haunt me for the rest of my career." No, I probably misheard.
Never mind. Luxury lodgings tonight, then a pootle down the M2 in the morning. I'm off to the bar for a couple of glasses of Krug!