Thursday, February 05, 2009

Tell Laura I Love Her!

Ding dong! Piloting the old Toyota Priapus to the Smoke (Margate) last night, a vision of loveliness appeared to me out of the gloom! I'm talking about the new posters that are springing up all over the island for the Tories' South Thanet candidate, the lovely Laura Sandys.

Much like that road to Damascus thing in the bible, it was a revelation. So much so, that I only narrowly avoided careering off the highway and ending up in the ditch, thus emulating the only other tale I know from the good book, that good Samaritan thing.

I don't care if she hasn't got planning permission for the posters. I don't care if she espouses environmental issues whilst supporting the expansion of Chas'n'Dave International Airport. I don't care if she's already got a husband called Randy. This is one Blue Rinse babe that gets my vote! I'd be happy to take her on a 'night flight' any time, if you catch my drift!

Click here to read more on yourfannitinnit website

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

Are you sure your undercarriage is up to the job?

Eastcliff Richard said...

Yep - I'm a bit of a dab hand at getting the old flaps down if I say so myself.

Crikey! Did I think that or type it?!

JP Blanchard said...

ECR - one assumes you're not talking about a 'Jumbo' night flight in which case I have no objections.

Anonymous said...

CAreful what you do with your joystick ECR.

Anonymous said...

and watch out for premature ejection!!

Anonymous said...

And any nasty spillages that could contaminate the water supply.

Peter Checksfield said...

I told you she's a babe (in an older sophisticated kind of way!).

Anonymous said...

Cmon Laura get yer kit off for Peter!

Anonymous said...

no,she is much too attractive for one of peter's models.

Anonymous said...

ooh you bitch

Anonymous said...

It appears you'll have to come up with some new lines as she's admitted her mistake but is going to have the darned things put on wheels so they can be moved around.

If on wheels they're temporary not permanent.

Come on guys, let's have some mobile jokes -great mover and so on.

Eastcliff Richard said...

Does that mean she gets to 'caster' vote! Ba-da-boom ching!

Anonymous said...

Actually the vehicles have to keep moving. Something that's on an old banger or farm lorry that's put down roots in a field needs planning permission after all.

Scope there for a few gags, methinks.

Anonymous said...

Oh! No I hope she isn't setting a new trend - do we really want larger than life size photos of some of our local politicians by the roadside. HELP!!

Laura and Randolph said...

i almost never make a comment on a blog site but i have just so enjoyed this exchange i had to thank you all!

Keep up the fun...

Laura and Randolph (Randy to the blogosphere)

Anonymous said...

Sorry, Laura Sandys is nothing but a bandwagon-jumping, opportunistic, self-publicist. She will undoubtedly be as crap an MP as her side-kick in Thanet North.

Charlie Thomas said...

Hang about a bit, I gave her the name Bandwagon Laura last year but forgot to trade mark it so feel free to use the term.

It's fascinating how often she puts out a press release that quietly gets forgotten when someone points out she's actually going against her own party. I e-mailed her about her most recent leaflet that was full of comments that were going against her own party's views and policies. Her reply was a hoot as she tried to say, more or less, it was her campaigning that had got the government to change its policies.

She claims, according to the S.M.E.G. website, to be for passenger flights but not freight. Was she not kept informed by her own party when Infratil decided to try to get the Section 106 changed to allow later flights? If you believe she wasn't kept informed then either 1)her own party don't support her or 2) she's not be strictly accurate.

How can she claim to be green and support expansion of an airport.

By the way, I do not believe she didn't know she needed planning permission for her hoardings. She was just trying it on but got caught out by eagle-eyed locals.

Anonymous said...

Laura is the hottest thing to hit thanet since the last ice age, lets enjoy the experience

The educated people of Thanet said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Kentish peasant. said...

Ouch, that's a bit strong. I wouldn't have gone so far myself but there's nothing like telling it as you see it.

Mind you, my concern would be if she did turn out like our previous Tory MP and never be seen here except at Tory 'do's'. He referred to 'his peasants in Kent' so, frankly, got everything he deserved in the end.

Anonymous said...

I expect that you David and your colleagues Mike Harrison and Mark Nottingham will be denouncing a clearly Labour supporting 1:13 for his vile language, statements and accusations.

This is exactly the kind of behaviour that you criticise your opponents for, so I expect a denounciation from you all.

Eastcliff Richard said...

'You David'? Er, no, it's me, Richard here, 10:35am.

And 1:13am, I think you must have been suffering a bit from the night terrors there. I don't ordinarily censor comments, but that's going slightly too far.

I've reprinted your comment below with the offending bits taken out:

Her dad was prosecuted for treason...

Court marshalled in fact, which she admits on her website.

and --- ---- -- ------- -- --- --- of that lying, evil, UKIP- supporting, official secret act breaching, perjuring c*cksucker of a sh*theaded loser Jonathan Aitken.

Fair comment I'd say.

Therefore, it would be an amazing thing if she turns out to be anything but a ----, -----------, -------, ------------- ---------, ---------, useless, ----------, ------, ------------, ---------------, old ---- ----.

I know she can't help having a face like a ------- ------- ---- wearing a badly --------- barbara windsor ---. But my own personal belief is that people with such ------ ----- and ---- ---- tend to either be evil or have serious personality flaws. Or, quite possibly both.


'Nuff said!

Intelligent people of Thanet said...

Goodness me, what a reaction over something that most people think.

Night terrors, well maybe, looking up her face does tend to do that. I had to look at Angelina Jolie for an hour on youtube afterwards to get that hideous, witchlike pointy chin of Sandys out of my memory.

I accept you have to cover yourself Richard but I have a good knowledge of media law and there was nothing I said that was libel-action worthy.

It's hilarious however that you edited the bit about her looking like she is wearing a badly peroxided blonde Barbara Windsor wig. If I could post pictures on here I would put a picture of Sandys and of a recent picture of Barbara Windsor side by side and the rememblance will be clear.

I'm not suggesting that she Laura 'badly peroxided' her hair or wears a wig. All I'm saying it that he hair happens to look like a bad Barbara Windor wig. I'm sure that Laura actually does have blonde hair at the age of 58, or whatever she is.

I don't mind my comments being edited, if it amuses you Richard, but please only take out the bits that are libelous rather than my perceptions based on facts.

Eastcliff Richard said...

I too have a good knowledge of media law, iPOT. Plus it's my blog. So I win.

Nonetheless I'll give you pointy chin and Barbara Windsor wig.

Personally, yes, I did think it was more amusing with the blanks as it left something to the imagination.

Anonymous said...

I totally agree, i had to have a sneaky "twitch" in the near-by bushes after pogging that true blue bitch. WOOF!