Well let's face it, it's a rum choice on the Ile de Thanet.
I usually vote on local rather than national issues, which makes the Tories round here unelectable. Besides, I can't help thinking that bum-faced Dave and his Bullingdon chums cooked all this up back at Eton and Oxford twenty years ago. They're still the Nasty Party in my book, and nothing I've seen emanating from their slavering Thanet adherents has convinced me otherwise. Quite the reverse in fact.
Our incumbent Labourite, Dr Steve Ladybloke, might be a better choice. But I'm haunted by visions of that £25,000 donation to his constituency association by the island's uber-millionaire Ken Wills, just ahead of Our Ken getting planning permission for China Gateway. Dr L seems hell bent on 'JOBS!' at any cost, not least to our lovely local environment. Then there's the small matter of him calling me a liar over that Eurof*****s debacle last November (we're still waiting for their ship to come in, Steve!)
Ordinarily I would vote Lib Dem. But the candidate here has been parachuted in from god knows where and clearly doesn't have the foggiest about local issues. He's the only one of all the major Thanet candidates who didn't rule out Manston night flights like a shot in my Election Question Time. Clearly he's out of touch, or, more likely, was never in touch in the first place. He would, however, provide me with endless comedy material for the next five years, simply because of his name.
So I'll be writing STUFF THE LOT OF YER! on my ballot paper when I toddle round the corner to the polling station later on. When the booths close at 10pm I'll have full analysis of my election poll, and be telling you who you'll be waking up to in No 10 tomorrow morning!