Recession? What recession? As I sit here awash with Canadian export dollars from my recent trip, my mind has naturally turned to what every good meedja type thinks of when they've got a bob or two - cocaine. No, no, er, no, that's not right, er I meant - chariddy.
Long term readers of this drivel will recall that I held a Green Nose Day back in 2007 to raise money for the last Red Nose Day. So before I'm whisked off in the stretched limo to slave my petooty off and hobknob with the fromage de la fromage of British comedy at TV Centre, I'm giving you an opportunity to lend your support.
Here's how it works. For every comment appended to this post today, I'll donate a gleaming new oncer to Comic Relief. So whaddya waiting for? Get commenting! And let's see if we can beat the 2007 total of 40 smackers!
52 comments:
Here's one to get the ball rolling!
ECR
This makes me soooooo green with envy, I will leave five not so crispy oner's at the normal drop off point [in brown a envelope] next Wednesday as that's when my social security cheque arrives.
Aha - a pair of balls now! Er, no, make that three.
Sooooooooo glad to have you back on-line again...worth turning the old computer on for!
Glad to see you mutli-mogul types putting your hand in your pocket for us poor and needy...am trying to get onto Ezekiel's blog to see if he is doing the same thing!...ah, I forget he can't read can he...um, so no blog there then...
I read that Canada was taking over from the San Fernando Valley as the centre of the Porn industry.
Is there any truth that you were employed as a fluffer on your recent trip ?.
There's not much future in fluffing these days, due to the increasingly widespread use of Viagra in the industry. So that one doesn't, er, stand up 10:21.
Blast! I've done meself out of another quid!
Glad to see you back from Canada. I spent a month there in 2003 travelling around from West to East. Very nice country indeed.
Yes, it is a mighty fine country Adem. And the people are soooooo nice!
Bugger. I've done it again!
I'll give you a joke for Red Nose day - Manston airport. (Apologies - cheap I know).
I have a Green nose at the moment, but that's down to a bad cold.
'MR X'
Here's another joke - TDC!
Welcome back old chap we missed you but our aim will improve with time. Green nose day now that is a serious cold if you got green candles, must have been something you picked up in Canada.
Your posts are the one joy in this wasteland. A shame it costs you a quid but look forward to your future offerings.
Why thank you, 12:01.
Er, billhooks. There goes another sov.
I err, oh bugger! I had something really witty and interesting to say but then I remembered I live in Broadstairs. Damm
Oh hang on a minute, its all coming back to me now, it had something to do with the mating habits of snails and how they get confused by discarded bacon rind. No its gone again, damm!
You're a generous chap, ECR.
brown nose day - happens each time the council receives a planning application from Manston
Look Richard, are you just trying to bump up the comments so I have to donate more?
Blast!
I hear every day is Red Knob Day in Margate.
what do you call a man with 3 planks of wood on his head?
Edward Woodward
What do you call a man with 4 planks of wood on his head?
Dunno, but Edward Woodward would.
Richard
You have seen through my tatty veneer but I will donate whatever you do plus a staggeringly generous 50%!!!!! Us health and safety professionals (guffaw) have to redeem ourselves some how.
Conkers in bubble wrap for all!!!!!
Brown nose day!!
Ha ha. Very funny. I larfed at that one.
Come on Dicky... I will if you will! (or is the jet lag still getting the better of you) Sorry, there was something I was supposed to remember about snail rind.
Bloody hell ........... thats £37.50 I have to cough up already ( I am not sure I am doing myself any favours here.
My nose is bigger than your nose (ha)! 39 and counting!
whitewash day that is what i fear monday 16th will be - did you know you are used in evidence for our leader's defence, you must get up his nose - that's my contribtion for red nose day! Bit snotty that would be though!
Anonymous... sod off this is costing me and the bloke in the big house serious money here (sorry ECR). but if you want to empty your bag then offer some wonger (sorry once again ECR but I felt I had to intervene) Where have my lovely snails gone now?
Shit I am running out off prehensile mini limbs to keep track of my debt...off with the socks!!!
Please, please please nobody else respond to this blog otherwise, in order to honour my fool hardy boast of 150% I will have to start selling additional body parts (how I miss Mr big toe two). So stop being so generous with my flesh, unless you are prepared to pay ( my pretty). Oooops
Erm, sorry, wrong blog.
OK 2-29pm...I won't post anything then.
'MR X'
Can somebody tell me the way to the post office please?
Oh, it's ok, I can see it from here...thank you
Alright this may have only cost ECR 34 quid but this is well on the way to costing me bloody loads (£52 to be precise). So stop posting inane comments now, or else the snails get it!!!!!!
Lumme - this is going to break the bank! Must wire Mr Ceaucescu (no relation) for more roubles.
Arse!
Let the snails have it, I say.
Brian White, Head of 'Allowing The Airport To Do What The F**k They Want Department', now has a new nickname.
Ankles
Because he is so far up Matt Clarkes arse, that all you can see of him
Fearing your newly strained financial status might be affected by your impetuously generous nature, Dickie old chap, I was loathe to post here and cost you another pound! Well done, anyway! Let me know if you need a Red Cross parcel next week.
Well done Richard old chap, my children have discovered that this years red noses double as bouncing balls.
Michael
Which Dick are you referring too, this is going to cost ECR a small fortune and me one and a half times a small fortune (and I don't live anywhere near any millionaires)! ( Although there is a lovely squirrel that pops into the garden from the park next door).
Glad you're back safely from Canada Eastcliff. Glad to help you give another oncer to a good cause. BTW do look out for the Edinburgh Woolen Mill stuff if you haven't already.
Nice one ECR....
HAHAHAHA
I think it's really kind of u to do this, I gave 20p to someone with a bucket and bought 2 red noses, and I felt ripped off
so I'm gonna assist you in donating
£1
£2
Was you filming:
a. Due South.
b. Grizzly Adams.
c. Ice Road Truckers.
Or are you really the Florida-based porn director, Cezar Capone, who offered to pay Palin 2 million bigones to appear in an adult film production? Has got my vote ;)
Welcome back ER! After all that gadding about in the colonies I expect your enjoying the deafening silence of the 'Costa'.
I wonder whether I can post 100,000 times....?
Ezekiel is a cnut.
is that a King Cnut?
do we get to see any pictures of the nice snailies?
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