Friday, August 08, 2008

What A Yacht I've Got!

Excitement is mounting in Boredstares, I'm told, where Victorian bathing costumes are about to make way for the thrills and spills of hemp smocks and bladders on sticks.

Yes, the Dickensians are eagerly anticipating their annual Folk Week (or Drunk Week as it's become known locally), which kicks off today. Around 150,000 men and women with beards are expected to descend on the UK's second best seaside town, turning the camp site at Upton School into a mini version of Glastonbury, with the waft of illicit drugs such as Old Nutty Shag and Nadger's Dorchester Wobbly permeating the air.

Meanwhile, here in the Millionaires' Playground, we're anticipating something much more salubrious. Ramsgate Week, organised by our very own Shirley Temple Yacht Club, will see the cream of the yachting fraternity hoity-toiting on land and sea for six days as of tomorrow. According to the lovely Commodore Davena Green, 'Ramsgate Week now provides a real alternative to Cowes', which presumably has had to be cordoned off several times in the last few years due to foote and mouthe.

With one or two financial transactions still being in the, er, pipeline I shan't be participating in the sailing. But you will be able to spot me in my Captain's cap, brass buttoned blazer and deck shoes with the salty seamen on the front. I might even get my Rolex Oyster (Whitstable Edition) back from Hiltons for the occasion. And I'll definitely be rooting out my CockSox swimmers for the Hunks in Trunks competition!

Eastcliff Richard makes no apology for running this exact same article last year. After all, nothing's changed, has it?

Avast behind! Participants prepare to get their bottoms scraped
at last year's the 2006 Ramsgate Week

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hullo Eastcliff

Bets are on.

Anonymous said...

I am afraid this post with its picture sets a 'Bum' note

Anonymous said...

Bum note comment came in at evens

after 1 hour 28 minutes.

Ante post betting has opened on ECR's next thread.

Mrs Tee Pee said...

"Around 150,000 men and women with beards are expected to descend on the UK's second best seaside town"

I will be one of them.
Please - Make way for the extremely large pregnant bearded lady waddling through Broadstairs this afternoon!

Lucy Mail said...

I'll be popping along to see the Marquis du Bier myself, later.

Anonymous said...

Two unexpected comments there making it a day for the bookie so far.

Anonymous said...

Made me laugh last night in Broadstairs when a pub had a donation box on the bar asking customers to donate as "we have had to pay towards the road closures for Folk Week".

On a normal Saturday night there are usually around 4 people in said pub and last night it was packed.

Anonymous said...

I suggest you stuff a couple of Extras and a Sadscene down the front of your speedos if the rumours are true, at last they have a use.

Avoid Your Thanet, as you might have a picture of Thanets most besieged blogger nestled up to your meat and two veg, not a pleasent image .

Tony Beachcomber said...

One year I took my camcorder along to folk week and captured on film some bearded guy skipping along the street who looked like a retired hells angel dressed in a pink frock. He was holding what look like a length of scaffolding and so were his mates. I thought they were going on there way to beat someone up, but I have since learnt it is some sort of morris dance they perform.

Anonymous said...

The man in the pink frock was there today!

Anonymous said...

Will the venerable Beach be bringing his brand new yacht, the SS Bacanda to show it off!

I hear it still has it's gift tag attached!

Anonymous said...

I hear the boys in blue are interested in your Tesco bags ECR. Is that them I hear banging on your door, or is it your knees knocking. Bertie Biggles exposed - your turn next - what fun!

Eastcliff Richard said...

Well, a right mixed Tesco bag of comments there!

I tooled along meself for the torchlight procession, and indeed spotted the man in the pink nightie as he proceeded past our very own Plain Jane.

What a star-studded night for Boredstares!

Eastcliff Richard said...

Oh, and 9:03am - if I may remove my ECR hat for a moment, as someone who has been held at gunpoint by armed terrorists in the course of my journalistic duties, and been harassed by government agencies who resented my investigations into them, I'm hardly likely to break into a cold sweat at the thought of Kent's finest knocking on my door, am I?

Anonymous said...

9.03; it's nice to see you back Simon! I take it you had a change of morals and decided not to resign after all!

Still getting the visits from the police are you?

Anonymous said...

Anyway 9.03. You've seen the contents of the Tesco bags as well!

Anonymous said...

But I know whoEKR is but I will not tell, as mystery is the spice of life

Anonymous said...

ECR

Snap. In my case the gun was pointed at my testalia. And my thought were of Malcolm Muggeridge and boiled cabbage as I did not want the emotion of the moment to cause any increase of the target size.

I can tell you were a bit miffed at 9.03 though ECR.

You could hardly have been held at gunpoint by unarmed terrorists.

However thanks as I just won on good odds for ECR slipping in a tortology (spelling ?)

Anonymous said...

It is tautology.

Freudian slip I had just been thinking of joined at the hip Bill Hayton and naturally had been reading about torts, malfeasance and that sort of thing.

Watch Kent old bill for abuse of protection from harassment act.

So with your journo experience you reckon to be able to spot a spook ECR ?

Eastcliff Richard said...

Er, I think if I'd said I'd been held at gunpoint by somebody who was pointing a gun at me, that might have been tautologous, oh 346 IQed Mensa member.

Anyhoo, I've put my ECR hat back on so there'll be no more talk of what I can and cannot spot! After a refreshing weekend break, I'm ready to fire off a few more rounds next week, so watch this space!

Anonymous said...

You've rattled him 9:03. I can smell it from Broadstairs!

Tony Beachcomber said...

Some of those folkies have absolutley no dress sense, The guy in the pink nightie was spotted with a denim jacket over the nightie.I am no Beau Brummel even I know Denim and pink nighties do not match. Whatever next, morris dancers in flip flops.

Anonymous said...

7.22, you can smell lots of things in Boredstairs!