Thursday, March 08, 2007

The Brown Pimpernel


Toddling down to the corner shop earlier, I spied an elderly gentleman of military bearing who was berating one of our council's 'waste and recycling' operatives about the stinky rubbish that had been 'recycled' all over the pavements.

The operative was explaining that the seagulls were to blame for the fact that the street was awash with filth. 'They tear open the bin bags on bin day and it gets everywhere,' he said, as if there was nought could be done about it. At which point the elderly gentleman marched off muttering something about whether it was legal to shoot seagulls and/or council officers.

I continued on my errand, scanning the pavement rather more acutely than I've become accustomed to, and was shocked by the number of barkers' nests impeding my progress. I've been banging on about them for more than a year, but the problem has, if anything, got worse.

So I've decided direct action is called for. Taking my cue from that story yesterday about a fellow in Huddersfield who goes around at night spraying potholes with yellow paint, I'm straight off to B&Q to get myself a can of their finest. Only question is, what colour? Brown's clearly out. Pink maybe? I know - luminous green! That way they'll show up at night, too!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Roger Gale (North Thanet, Conservative) | Hansard source

To ask the Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs what steps he plans to take to ensure that local authorities introducing dog control orders adhere to his Department's published guidelines of 'proportionate and reasonable' response to the need for controls.

Ben Bradshaw (Minister of State, Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs) | Hansard source

Although Dog Control Orders do not need confirmation by the Secretary of State, local authorities (LAs) can only introduce them after completing the procedure prescribed in the Dog Control Order (Procedures) Regulations 2006. The procedure includes a period of local consultation and notification in the local press. This gives dog owners and local residents the opportunity to make representations to the LA on the proposed controls. In our guidance to LAs on this issue, we have strongly advised them to consider any representations prior to making the orders. They should also provide details of alternative areas in the vicinity where owners can exercise their dogs. Failure to take into consideration the views of the local community could lead to the control order being challenged in the courts.

Officers authorised by secondary authorities must also complete a training course, approved by DEFRA, before they are able to issue fixed penalty notices for Dog Control Order offences.

Richard Eastcliff said...

I imagine the Secretary of State for Environment would be taking very careful steps indeed if he was ever called upon to walk around the streets of Ramsgate.

Nethercourt said...

What! No Wheelie-bins? I'd 'av thought they'd 'av been delivered by now. P'raps the faux fur stretch covers a'int done yet....

Richard Eastcliff said...

Well of course I would be beside myself, Nethers, if that were the case.

But the truth of the matter is that our friends on Uranus have declared the East Cliff a wheelie-free zone, due to the density of housing in those grubby back streets and their inability to come up with any kind of workable alternative.

Anyone for diamond-studded dustbins?