Tooling back from a splendid night out with my millionaire Ramsgate friends, I was surprised to come across a fleet of Kent's finest, and various NHS meatwagons, parked in one of those grimy backstreets behind the front here on the trendy East Cliff. According to several eyewitnesses, one of the local east Europeans had been flattened by an indigenous inhabitant, almost certainly fuelled by 'premium' lager e.g. Stella and/or 1664.
Quite why Stella Artois advertise themselves as something special and French, when we all know it's the alcoholics' alcohol of choice round here, heaven knows. Presumably the expensive adverts suggesting that only the upper eschelons can afford it are a deliberate antidote to the actual truth, viz that only boozy twats with seven illegitimate kids by various crack whores would even touch Stella. No wonder I saw a Transit van full of the stuff being delivered to the local CostCutter earlier today!