Ho! Ho! Ho! It's Christmas! I always get a bit over-excited when the festive season approaches!
One of the yuletide traditions in the Eastcliff household (after Bertie and I have exchanged presents and scoffed the turkey), is to sit down in front of a blazing fire and test the old noddle with a few brainteasers.
This year, what better way to celebrate than to share our quiz with all you lovely readers? And to make it more interesting, I've based the questions on the events and people that have shaped the Ile in 2006.
So come on, even you lot in Margate can have a go! After all, I'm sure you won't have any difficulty in finding a blazing fire to settle down in front of over there, will you?
January
Which local politician was quoted as saying he wanted to put the 'wow! factor' back into Thanet?
A: Animal-loving Sir Roger Wind
B: Ferrari-loving Dr Steve Ladyboy
C: Garlic-hating Councillor Sandy Beach
Answer
February
What came onshore in Margate?
A: 40,000 tons of rotting seaweed
B: The Anthea Turner Centre
C: 12 pallets of Primark undies
Answer
March
New plans are announced to 'fill Dreamland with rides for the summer'. Who made this promise?
A: One of the local madams
B: Margate sponsors Bryant and May
C: One-Eyed Pete the carny guy
Answer
April
Who unexpectedly withdrew his column?
A: Sir Roger Wind
B: Lord Nelson
C: Long Dong Silver
Answer
May
Who was photographed playing with some balls on Broadstairs beach?
A: Graham Norton
B: David Beckham
C: Councillor Jeff Kirkpatrick
Answer
June
Thanet District Council launched its 'Thanet Is Beautiful' campaign by attaching banners to local beauty spots. To what did they attach their banner in Ramsgate?
A: Dolly Parton impersonator Mandy Winters
B: The 'temporary' fencing along the crumbling East Cliff
C: The world famous Granville Theatre
Answer
July
Our ruggedly handsome council leader was spotted out and about, but who won my competition to find a caption for this photograph?
A: Dane Valley Ted with: "And may I thank Victoria Beckham for extending the hand of friendship to the people of Thanet."
B: Snailspace with: "Will someone please tell Iris to get off of that broom and walk. This is a pedestrian zone dontchaknow."
C: Ram Skate Raider (sniff) with: "Unleashed, it sticks out this far."
Answer
August
Revolution was in the air as the Thanet Community Development Trust decided to up the rent on one of the few places in the area where teenagers could still have a good time without unwanted pregnancy. But what is Thanet Community Development Trust?
A: A charity
B: A company
C: A charitable company
Answer
September
BBC Radio Kent broadcast an item about blogging in the county. Someone who sounded a bit like me was featured, but the voice had been altered. What did it sound like?
A: HAL the computer from 2001: A Space Odyssey
B: Pinky and/or Perky
C: Norman Wisdom
Answer
October
Scientists discover that anti-fouling paint on the bottom of luxury yachts in Ramsgate's Royal Harbour is causing whelk penises to shrink. What name did they give to this phenomenon?
A: Dumpton Syndrome
B: Dumped On Syndrome
C: Big Yacht Syndrome
Answer
November
Thanet planning chiefs were rapped for mistakenly saying a three storey building would only be two storeys high. What else have the planning department got wrong?
A: The Turnip Centre
B: Dreamland
C: Just about everything
Answer
December
A local celebrity claimed to have become engaged to charming new blogger Frances Oapen, but was later discovered to have gone off half cock. Who was the blushing, would-be bridegroom?
A: High-flying doctor of somethingology Simon Moores
B: Fun-loving doctor of laughology Richard Eastcliff
C: Bum-loving doctor of proctology Justin Brown
Answer
Bonus Question!
Which local councillor was secretly filmed during the year expressing a surprisingly musical side to his personality?
Answer
So how did you do?
0 - 4 correct answers - Michael Barrymore
5 - 8 correct answers - Dale Winton
9 - 12 correct answers - Jonathon Ross
13 correct answers - Me!!!!
And if you've still got an appetite for quizzes after all that, I can thoroughly recommend the new Prince of Wales Quiz Book by Marcus Berkmann, available at all good stockists price £12.99.
And thanks for the case of Krug, Mr B!
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