Thursday, June 18, 2009

News Rubble

Four piles of news to report:

BONG! It seems our beloved council's planning department has actually refused Auclair Properties permission to rebuild our Grade II listed Marina Restaurant, which they so carelessly demolished 500 days ago.

At the time there were mutterings about prosecuting them unless they put it back together brick by brick. But due to the current state of the property market Auclair claimed that would be uneconomical without an 'enabling development', viz a carbuncle of 'luxury flats' welded to the side. According to my chum Bertie Biggles, the council has now grown a shiny set of Gordon Ramsay style testicles and told them to stick their carbuncle where the sun don't shine! Hurrah!

BONG! The super-duper, 800mph trains that will whisk Londoners to and from the Millionaires' Playground in under 15 minutes have begun regular services between Ashford and St Pancras. The limited service is in preparation for the real deal - Ramsgate to St Pancras - in December. No wonder fine restaurants and snazzy boutiques are opening up daily here in the Cannes of Kent! Here's a glimpse of one of the 3000mph trains on a test run out of Ramsgate:


BONG! The Met Office forecasts our lovely tip of Kent could well be a sizzling 56 degrees centigrade by summer 2080 due to global warming. By then it'll definitely be time to break out the parasols and pinas, as Ramsgate basks in Mediterranean sun while Marbella burns to a crisp! Mind you, I'm not sure Kaddy Tea-Pot and the rest of the weather chaps have perfected the five day forecast yet, let alone the 72 year one!

BONG! And finally, who's this doing a Judith Chalmers impersonation on behalf of Thanet Council?


And there was me thinking Smell the Profit was a stinker! 'Ramsgate is easily accessible by car, boat train or plane. European flights are available into Thanet's own Manston Airport.' Actually it was only Jersey the last time I looked, luv!

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

No mention of the Wild Life that frequents Harbour Street every Friday and Saturday night.

Anonymous said...

Or the sh*t that's currently infesting the harbour.

Stop Manston Expansion Group said...

Or the strange noise and smells created by 40 year old African sh1t buckets flying over right where she was sitting.

Anonymous said...

or the rubbish on monday mornings because "our Shirl" hasnt got wheelie bins rolled out into Ramsgate yet! the seagulls and foxes usually got there first!
At least our leader can boast of one successful town's cafe culture but he certainly cant take the credit! meanwhile Margate limps on....

Anonymous said...

That music sounds like its been lifted off a porn film I once watched.

Anonymous said...

A somewhat rosy picture I agree. Why don't you send them your famous photo of Augusta Road swimming in litter ECR?

Anonymous said...

Why try highlighting the bad points 8:11? Don't you know even the basics about marketing an area?

Stop Manston Expansion Group said...

11.39pm, what 08.11pm and others point out here are the basic errors TDC make in trying to entice visitors/businesses to Ramsgate. Rubbish on the streets, sh1t floating in the harbour, planes at less than 1,000ft over the very spot Judith was sitting, swimming pool turned to carpark, beach surrounding by bugger all. This publicity video might get someone down for a daytrip, but once they've seen the reality they wonlt come back.

Lucy Mail said...

Gracious me, that train's a mover, isn't it? It must have been doing almost 15MPH by the end of that vid!
Who would want to be one of those poor unfortunates, standing on the platform at Dumpton, that will almost certainly be sucked off as it passes?

Anonymous said...

There are worse things in life than being sucked off at Dumpton, although the location is less than salubrious.

Anonymous said...

Lucy was that you grabbing at my smalls, as the train flew past at 15mph?

Lil~Miss~Lunatic said...

"If you take a wander up harbour street you'll find the bussling town centre..."

Which they chose not to film... Would it really put Ramsgate in a bad light to have 40 odd chavs stopping the camera team and asking "Ave ya got 30 pence mate? Nah seriously, why you holdin' out me? I just want 30 pence!"

I mean it's not like they're trying to portray Ramsgate as a holiday destination now is it? :P