Toilet Protesters Stage Sit-In

Here I am in Jersey about to go into a taxing but blissfully tax-free meeting with the backers of A Snip at £900 for the Harley Street Vasectomy Clinic. Yet thanks to the power of the internet I can assume almost godlike powers of omniscience! Which is why I know that, right about now, pissed off locals are taking matters into their own hands and staging a protest at the open/closed/open/closed loos down on the east end of our lovely Blue Flag beach there in the Ms' P.

A quick scan of the tourist map of Jersey kindly provided by the 12 star Radisson I'm staying in reveals no fewer than 32 public khazis located on this sunny Channel Island, which is roughly the same size geographically as Thanet, but with about two thirds of the population. On the other hand, our beloved council can only manage to keep around 20 conveniences open across our septic isle. Giving Jerseyans, by my calculation, a lavvie for every 2,700 citizens, and us Thanetians one inconvenient convenience for every 6,500.

So, good luck to the protesters! It's about time people stood up, or sat down (depending on their gender and requirement) for their right to splash out whenever they want to!