yourthanetlifeblogger

Waiting to get the old barnet trimmed down at Sweeney Todd's (next to the pie shop) yesterday, I idled away the time casting the Eastcliff mincers over this week's issue of yourthanet, one of the 1,200 local freesheets. But I must say I almost choked on my Murray Mint when I came across yet another yourthanetblogger item featuring His Councillorship from the north of the Ile.

He's been there every week for the past month. Now he's even got his photo on it. It's enough to give you the pip! And how can he be a blogger, when he's not blogging on his blinking blog? Oh yes, I forgot, he's billed as 'author of the popular but beseiged (sic) Thanet Life weblog'.

Well, considering he suspended it himself, I'd hardly call it a 'seige'. I mean, it's not quite Leningrad, is it?

GazunderWatch

Just back from the Croisette here in the Cannes of Kent, and there was a vicious rumour circulating among the millionaires down there that our local rag has been 'got at' by the ruling Blue Rinsers.

Nothing as laughable as the suggestion that the paper's blue masthead is subliminally inducing us to vote Conservative, or that now it's part of the Daily Mail's Northcliffe Media it'll be campaigning to re-animate that mad bat from the 80s. No, the word is that one of the Tories' Captain Mainwarings has threatened to cut down on TDC advertising if the paper doesn't cut back on the anti-council stories.

Of course I dismissed this theory as idle gossip and tittle-tattle, but then, after a few pints of the Gaddfather's finest, I got to thinking. There was no follow-up to the Stalag Broadstairs story this week. And the ongoing saga of our undredged harbour was relegated to page 16. What's more, the recent advent of competition in the shape of YawnThanet would make a threat to take council advertising elsewhere plausible.

So to test the theory I've instigated a new feature in the old sidebar on the right which I'm calling GazunderWatch. The idea is to keep a running tally each week of pro- and anti- council stories in our island's leading newspaper. Anodyne announcements, letters and opinion pieces don't count, it's purely the nitty-gritty news I'm interested in. I'm sure that after a few weeks scrutiny I can scotch this nonsense once and for all!

New Paper

It's here - the very first edition of your super, soaraway yourthanet! I picked this up from a pile in the corner of the corner shop this morning. Published by those nice people at Kent on Sunday, yourthanet imaginatively styles itself The newspaper for Margate, Ramsgate, Broadstairs and district.

As you can see, the front page splashes drooping fortunes at Pfizer, our local Viagra manufacturer, whose lead has definitely fallen out of its pencil. Mind you, the writing was already on that particular wall back in December. The paper's nicely laid out, with the usual KOS mix of style, celebrity, and a little bit of news thrown in. There's even a 'mystery blogger' who does a passable but ultimately unconvincing imitation of yours truly. All wrapped around the meat in the sandwich - reams and reams of ads for property and cars.

My old mate Frank appears to be a big fan, judging by the number of pages he's taken out. In fact local bigwigs have flocked to congratulate KOS on the launch. Among the twittering stars in Thanet's firmament to append their best wishes are Sir Roger Wind, Dr Steve Ladychap, and our glorious council leader Sandy Beach, who, with no sense of irony whatsoever, given the story on page 5 which details Margate traders at their wits' ends over the closure of the Dreamland cinema ('There's nothing left here'), kicks off his spiel with: 'People and businesses are upbeat and they talk about the opportunities that are available.' Constant plugs, too, for yourkenttv, a pallid version of my own ECR TV surrounded by annoying ads.

Oh well, it's bound to be ludicrously lucrative, and will certainly give Sadscene a run for its money, if not the Gazunder itself. Now, all I need is a silly name for it. Anyone for yawnthanet?

Update: Kent County Council's TV offering, due to launch on 21st September courtesy of 1.6m of your council tax pounds, is now running a promo on its website. Typically for a made in Maidstone production, their opening gambit is: 'Kent TV, coming soon from Maidstone, Canterbury, Faversham, Tunbridge Wells, Dover, Whitstable!' Not a dickie bird about the 127,000 souls who live in Kent's East End.

Honestly, next time my council tax demand arrives, I'm seriously contemplating posting the cheque to Lille.