Saturday, August 10, 2013

What A Yacht I've Got!

Excitement is mounting in Boredstares, I'm told, where Victorian bathing costumes are about to make way for the thrills and spills of hemp smocks and bladders on sticks.

Yes, the Dickensians are eagerly anticipating their annual Folk Week (or Drunk Week as it's become known locally), which kicks off today. Around 150,000 men and women with beards are expected to descend on the UK's second best seaside town, turning the camp site at Upton School into a mini version of Glastonbury, with the waft of illicit drugs such as Old Nutty Shag and Nadger's Dorchester Wobbly permeating the air.

Meanwhile, here in the Millionaires' Playground, we're anticipating something much more salubrious. Ramsgate Week, organised by our very own Shirley Temple Yacht Club, will see the cream of the yachting fraternity hoity-toiting on land and sea for six days as of tomorrow. Billed as 'the friendly alternative to Cowes', the regatta is expected to attract matelots from Belgium, Holland and France, as well as the UK.

With one or two financial transactions still being in the, er, pipeline I shan't be participating in the sailing. But I'll definitely be rooting out my CockSox swimmers for the Hunks in Trunks competition!

Eastcliff Richard makes no apology for running this exact same article every year since 2006. After all, nothing's changed, has it?

Avast behind! Participants prepare to get their bottoms scraped
at Ramsgate Week!


Anonymous said...

According to Kent Police "Officers are patrolling Broadstairs this weekend targeting antisocial drinkers. Those drinking irresponsibly will have their alcohol seized."
I just wonder what they are going to do with all the seized booze? Are they holding a jolly at the local cop shop or selling it off cheap?

Anonymous said...

One wonders why plod isn't patrolling EVERY weekend to control anti-social drinking. There was a time when you could spend a night in the cells for being drunk and disorderly. As far as I'm aware the law is still in place. It just isn't enforced. Who took that decision? Any offers? My money is on the same people who have pressured plod to enforce the law this weekend.

Anonymous said...

Anon 5.43

Cops drinking seized booze ended after an unfortunate number of incidents. I refer of course to the Special Brew laced with Red Bull and ExLax.

A number of Morris dancing types had been heard referring to the cocktail as "Seizure treatment".

TDC ensured that patrolling cops were issued with RADAR keys to be able to use disabled toilet facilities if urgent need overtook them.

After a Risk Assessment the Chief constable issued a directive memo. No drinking of seized booze.

This years strategy is to make drinkers drink their own booze as a prelude to determination of whether it is safe to seize.

You know that Kent Plod makes sense.

Anonymous said...

10:51, I understand that Special Brew is very popular in Brighton.

Anonymous said...

Not one but 3 police cars parked on the Broadstairs bandstand with an SOS police caravan. Bit heavy handed? it's a tourist event. A few pensioners moaning about drunk teenagers and the cops are fencing the place off.

Not good for tourism.

The 601 RYL van parked on the seafront yesterday too: who is that?

Anonymous said...

Why are planes still flying over the beaches too? The rural end should be used. Infratil seem to be keen to destroy tourism in Thanet.

Anonymous said...

The photo looks like Latchford and the UKIP schweinhund revealing their policies at last.

Did Latchford remove the Manston monitors and ignore the fines on the quiet when Deputy Leader at TDC before?

Anonymous said...

A vast oil tanker/car transporter ship this morning- perfect for Folk Week and tourists. What are the coastguard doing?

Anonymous said...

police cars on the bandstand again, with a backdrop of two ruddy huge oil tankers - even the 601RYL van driving along Ramsgate prom. All we need now is cars in the park and HGV's on the seafront. Tourism at its best. Kuh!

Anonymous said...

Why did Cargolux fly over Ramsgate at rooftop height at 6pm last night? Are the police concentrating on Broadstairs' morris dancers rather than a jumbo jet off route without radar or fire cover?

Anonymous said...

6:09, it came down to roof top height in order to ask someone the way to Manston in the absence of any radar. Due to a spate of bell, flower and stick thefts in Broadstairs the police presence is essential. Happy now?

Anonymous said...

So you're the troll with pointless or stupid comments 9:47?

Presumably you don't have children breathing in the Cargolux and KLM fumes or do you?

Anonymous said...

No, 10:55, and neither do you so what is your problem?

Anonymous said...

You don't have kids breathing in the fumes 6:33pm that's good, they won't get cancer or asthma then.

What about those people with kids though? And you're not saying the planes are supposed to fly over the towns are you?

Anonymous said...

There is more danger from the traffic fumes at St. Lawrence junction or Birchington roundabout than there is from the odd aircraft movement. Check out Thanet air quality statistics.