France For 15 Nicker!

As Adem has already pointed out on his Big Blog, those splendid chaps at Eurotunnel are running a special promo to celebrate their 15th birthday! You can take the jalopy any Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday from now until 17 December, and it'll only cost you three crisp fivers. What's more, you can be certain they'll be running! And, ahem, for the avoidance of any doubt, what I mean by that is, unlike the Dover ferries which were cancelled due to high winds yesterday, the Channel Tunnel is weatherproof.

They've also come up with 15 juicy facts for their 15th. For example, did you know they reduced their greenhouse gas emissions by 45% in 2008? Or that they've transported 35m vehicles since 1994, and 250m customers? And since the regs were relaxed in 2000, 475,000 happy pets have travelled with them. So go on, treat Rover to a day trip too. You never know, he might enjoy un poop sur la promenade!

Click here to go to Eurotunnel £15 promotion

Island Hopping

How splendid of my old showbiz chum 'n' Dec (of Ant 'n' Dec fame) to transport his cruiser all the way up from the Med for my trip back to the Ile de Thanet! Although I'm not sure what happened to 'All Hands on Dec I'. Best to gloss over that I suppose. Thanks to all the satellite wizardry on board, I'll be able to blog in as we cruise up the coast of northern France, feasting on caviar and sipping fizz! Then it's just a short hop across La Manche to the Millionaires' Playground.

While I've been pissing it up in Jersey, the more astute among you will have noticed that comments have been turned off to prevent the ongoing vomit of vexatious vilification from some of the blogosphere's more fragile members. However, now that I'm constantly in touch again, I've stood down from Defcon 1 to Defcon 2. Meaning that comments, anonymous or nonymous, will be allowed but moderated (i.e vetted by me before they're put on the blog).

Meanwhile, if you're bored and at a complete loss for something to do, you could always pop along for a morton at this pile of pants. Anyway, moustache now as I can hear the popping of corks! Laters!

Tour De Nowhere Near Here

Blimey! I'd just whipped out the Fortnums hamper for a spot of tiffin at a lovely little spot I know in the Kent countryside, when this lot came charging by. Something to do with the Tour de France apparently.

I did manage to flag one chap down, though, and explain to him at length that we would have loved to have accommodated the Tour in Ramsgate, but unfortunately we had a prior engagement. He seemed very upset at the news, judging by the way he grabbed me by the throat and shoved me into the verge!

Cycle Of Ignorance

Yet again the best bit of Kent gets a bum deal, with this weekend's Tour de France going no further east than Canterbury. Full marks, though, to one of our local estate agents who, with a delicious sense of irony, has commissioned our Doctor/Councillor from Westgate to tug a banner behind his teeny-tiny plane telling spectators to 'Go 2 Ramsgate'.

And just so that nobody can accuse me of not doing my bit, I've asked some of my god-fearing friends in the Canterbury area to rally to the cause!