Island Hopping

How splendid of my old showbiz chum 'n' Dec (of Ant 'n' Dec fame) to transport his cruiser all the way up from the Med for my trip back to the Ile de Thanet! Although I'm not sure what happened to 'All Hands on Dec I'. Best to gloss over that I suppose. Thanks to all the satellite wizardry on board, I'll be able to blog in as we cruise up the coast of northern France, feasting on caviar and sipping fizz! Then it's just a short hop across La Manche to the Millionaires' Playground.

While I've been pissing it up in Jersey, the more astute among you will have noticed that comments have been turned off to prevent the ongoing vomit of vexatious vilification from some of the blogosphere's more fragile members. However, now that I'm constantly in touch again, I've stood down from Defcon 1 to Defcon 2. Meaning that comments, anonymous or nonymous, will be allowed but moderated (i.e vetted by me before they're put on the blog).

Meanwhile, if you're bored and at a complete loss for something to do, you could always pop along for a morton at this pile of pants. Anyway, moustache now as I can hear the popping of corks! Laters!

Naval Gazing

Yes, I picked a good day to be watching the ships go by from my study here on Ramsgate's East Cliff, what with 1800 jobs going at the Beeb, and my old ITV chums Ant and Dec getting it in the neck for fleecing the viewing public with their mechanical pig.

Unfortunately it does mean, however, that my own proposal for a prime time comeback, Dickie's Big Dosh Dial-Up, will have to be put on hold for a bit. Shame, really. Only today Mr Ceaucescu (no relation) emailed me to say he was putting the finishing touches on the studio at his uncle's cowshed just outside Plovdiv.