Just How Naive Is Roger Gale?

In just a couple of hours' time, Thanet North's Tory MP Sir Roger Gale will step up to the parliamentary plate for an adjournment debate in the House of Commons on Manston Airport.

Whether there'll be more than one man and a dog listening is less than certain. In fact Sir Rodge may find himself talking to thin air, as I'm not sure David Blunkett counts saving money pit airports as one of his priorities.

Looking increasingly like Neville Chamberlain waving around worthless bits of paper whilst standing next to a plane, Roger's latest mutterings during the 'packed' meeting of 300 airport supporters at Margate's Winter Gardens on Saturday saw him make this statement: 'Half an hour ago, I held in my hand a letter from a significant potential investor, who I am satisfied - and I may be naive - has the money to make the bid.'

The key word there is 'naive'. Yes, Roger, you may well be naive, if your unwitting advocacy on behalf of a bunch of Thanet VAT fraudsters who have just been thrown into prison for a total of 27 years is anything to go by.

For this, dear reader, is where it gets interesting. In 2006 Sir Wind was standing up in parliament asking this question, according to Hansard: 'To ask the Chancellor of the Exchequer when HM Revenue and Customs expect to be in a position to repay the sums owing to Amber Communications Management Ltd. of Margate.'

To which Dawn Primarola, then Paymaster General, responded: 'Section 18 of the Commissioners for Revenue and Customs Act 2005 does not permit HM Revenue and Customs to disclose information relating to the tax affairs of individual taxpayers.'

Fast forward to 2014, and it appears that Amber Communications Management Ltd. of Margate was nothing other than a vehicle for a colossal VAT carousel fraud based around mobile phones, which ended up costing the public purse some £27m. It was such a whopper that HMRC even gave the investigation its own handle - 'Operation Chert'. You can read the full report in GoMoNews by clicking here.

Now of course nobody in their right legal mind, least of all little old me, is suggesting that Windy was in cahoots with these fraudsters. Far from it. Everyone agrees that Roger is a fab constituency MP, and he was probably just doing what he thought was best for his constituents.

But without a due diligence check or two? P..l...eeeeeeeeze! He's been an MP around here for 30 years, you would have at least thought he might have wondered why he hadn't heard of this amazing, hi-tech Thanet business that was turning over millions and was 'owed' significant sums by HMRC, wouldn't you?

Meanwhile Ann Gloag, the airport's Scottish squillionaire owner, is apparently so on tippy-toes to receive Roger's next piece of paper that she's taken leave in Africa to spend time with her charities. Nuff said.

Click here to vote on Save Manston blog against overturning the night flight ban

Latchford's Legacy

Well, it's the end of another news week, fellow millionaires!

And as the whole of Ramsgate waits on tenterhooks to learn the outcome of last night's Duffer cabinet meeting to decide the fate of our Royal Pavilion (will it be Wetherspoons?), it's got me thinking about the devastation that has been visited on our lovely seafront over the past decade or so. One name keeps springing to mind - Latchford!

For it was none other than Colonel Sir Roger Latchford OBE (pictured above in happier days with his former chum John Worrow) who, in his capacity as Regeneration Supremo and Chief Ezekiel Toady under the previous Tory administration, presided over most of the crap decisions that have blighted the Millionaires' Playground, and continue to do so.

Pleasurama, for example. Wasn't it The Colonel who was the chief flag waver for SFP and Tiny Terry's Royal Sands development? And look what a pile of steaming whatsit that turned out to be! I understand the Duffers' legal eagles are even now going through the paperwork with an electron microscope to try and discover why The OBE-ed One insisted there was no 'long stop' date built into the contract. I suspect, though, they won't find the Holy Grail of a get-out clause. The Pavilion's woes also stem back to his time in the driving seat, when his hands were clearly on the steering wheel that was up Ezekiel's backside.

(By the way, where is our Sandy? He must be out of chokey by now. Has anyone spotted him? I'm offering a crisp tenner to the first person who emails me a recent photo of the ex-con!)

Of course, Latchford is now head of the Kent contingent of the Purple (Foreign) People Eater Party. So he can now presumably lord it up in Maidstone, without having to get his hands mucky with all this Ramsgate mullarkey. In fact I'm told that he's ordered his Ramsgate contingent to desist from the previous protocol of regular chinwags with the local great and good. That's democracy folks!

Anyway, the Dom is on ice and I've got some of that nice duqqa dip waiting. Before I go, I'd urge you to sign this petition. No, silly! It's not the one to save the airport. It's the one to save that skatepark in Cliftonville that the Duffers dug up last week! Thus demonstrating that, no matter which side of the island or what colour banner is flying above Cecil Square, the Duffers will always be, er, duffers!

Moustache!

Westwood Angry

Christmas comes but once a year, and so today I made my annual pilgrimage (with the emphasis on the 'grim') to Westwood Cross. You see, I was in need of a department store, and whilst Debenhams doesn't even do a pale, Les Dennis style impersonation of John Lewis I wasn't prepared to pilot the G Swizz up the M2 to Bluewater and then remain there for 10 hours while it charged up for the journey back.

Needless to say parking was at a premium, unless you're one of those lucky blue badgers who pop the old permit on the dashboard of their 7 Series Beemer and then gaily hop, skip and jump the few yards to the shops. Even the grass verges had been colonised by cars.

Curiously, the centre itself has been colonised by potting sheds. An interesting choice of Christmas present, but one that will no doubt be more appreciated by Auntie Mavis than the traditional delight of a glass bowl filled with silverised Minstrels. This year every shop you enter is bedecked with posters of a gurning Harry Hill, but he seemed to have missed a trick with Vision Express which was empty when I nipped in to have the old glass eye serviced. Surely the sight of a larger than life Harry in his finest NHSers would have pulled in the visually impaired punters?

Now I do understand that I might be sounding a little 'Bah! Humbug!' by now. To be honest, it was nowhere near as traumatic an experience as I was expecting. The Ile de Thanet does need shops such as Debenhams, Next, HMV, Waterstones and M&S if it's going to compete with the likes of Canterbury. Trouble is, in the pre-Westwood past these shops would have been in our town centres where they belong. One north island, blogging doctor/councillor (no names mentioned) seems to think that despite Westwood detractors such as myself, the people have 'voted with their feet' (or perhaps more appropriately 'with their wheels'), a phrase much loved by Tricky Dicky Nixon in the 70s. But if I had the choice, I'd be shopping in Margate or, even better, Ramsgate this Christmas.

Still, I hear the Ramsgate Society has put forward a plan to erect an 'anchor store' on the Staffordshire Street car park site here in the Ms' P. What a splendid idea! Maybe in a year or two I'll be able to toddle down the road and buy Auntie Mavis a bilge pump and a couple of galvanised shackles for Crimble!

Please Refund My Licence Fee

Not only have I had to 'watch' the Headingley Test today staring at numbers on a TV which was playing radio commentary, but this evening's Any Questions from the Mike and Bernie Winter Gardens gave the second question to none other than Roger Latchford OBE, the truest, bluest duffer on Duffer Island.

As I'd rather undergo a meatotomy without anaesthetic than purchase any kind of Murdoch product, I'm just going to have to go out now and drink myself blind. At least that way I'll get a 50% refund. A bientot!

Davey Jones' Locker

In Memoriam
John Ryan
Creator of Captain Pugwash

So farewell
Then, Captain Pugwash.

Diddly-dum de
Diddly-dum de
Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-dum de

Diddly-dum de
Diddly-dum de
Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-dum de

Diddly-dum de
Diddly-dum de
Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-dum de
Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-dum
Dum dum

That was
Your theme tune.

My Dad says
Seaman Stains
Master Bates and
Roger the Cabin Boy
Were urban myths.

E. C. Richard (29)