East Of The Wantsum

Yet again I'm late putting up this week's East of the Wantsum (click on the image to enlarge). But then I have an excuse. The promotional epic I'm currently working on - Smell the Profit for the Polish Cheese Board - is not going well. Despite pulling an all-nighter in the edit suite, it still sounds like their president is admonishing the viewers to treat their gussets by handing round the cheesy Polish nipples.

I have a horrible feeling that, no matter how much I polish this Polish turd, the stench is going to haunt me for the rest of my life.

Art Attack

Boiling the kettle in, um, quivering anticipation of a yummy lunch of Aldi Hot Noodles earlier, I was interrupted by the front door bell. Thinking it might be that Red Cross food parcel I ordered, or one of my old showbiz chums come to whisk me off to lunch at the Ivy, I dashed to the door, only to be greeted by the sight of a young gentleman holding up a card which said:

I AM DEAF

I AM AN ARTIST AND HAVE DRAWINGS FOR SALE

I AM FROM POLAND

Given the current state of my other investments, I'm afraid the poor chap's request fell on blind eyes.

Update: According to a story running on Meridian local news the rozzers say this is some kind of scam to palm off photocopies of drawings, rather than original artwork. Apparently there have been reports of these chaps in 'rural parts of East kent'. Like, er, Ramsgate.

Could Do With A Bit More Polish

Mr Ceaucescu (no relation) has been moonlighting. And I don't mean making money with the mastic.

Trawling through BoobTube earlier today, I came across a short commercial he's made for that new East European deli on the high street. It isn't one of his finest pieces of work, I'm afraid. Not so much an advert as a badvert. See what you think:

Separated At Birth?

Reader Samantha writes:

I wonder if anyone else has spotted a similarity between the outgoing Prime Minister of Poland, Mr Jaroslaw Kaczynski, and the President of Poland, Mr Lech Kaczynski? Are they by any chance related?

Prime Minister/President, President/Prime Minister