Manston Pickle

You know me, I'm not one of those swivel-eyed rabble-rousers who's prone to posting controversial stuff in the hope of whipping up the lethargic locals into a state of revolutionary frenzy.

But no less an organ than the British Medical Journal has just reported a link between aircraft noise, especially at night, and the risk of heart disease and death from stroke. The report confirms what other studies have found, including one large-scale German analysis that concluded there was a 66% increased risk of heart attacks in men, and a whopping 139% increased risk in women, should knackered old jumbos be whining over your bonce while you're trying to get a bit of the old shut-eye.

I've run those odds past Cyril, my bean counter (he's a whizz with an Excel spreadsheet), and apparently that means there's a statistical chance of everyone in Ramsgate being dead by next Tuesday, should RAF London Kent Manston Margate Tracey Emin Maggie Thatcher Schipol International Airport decide to bust the toothless no night flights ban, which, er, it already does anyway.

Meanwhile Manston's bosses Infratil have been on a shindig to Shanghai, where they've decided to offload their other UK loss-making lump, Glasgow Prestwick Airport, onto the poor old Scottish taxpayer. You'd hope they'd be paying Lexy Salmon and his kilted crew to take it off their hands, but we all know from recent experience here on the Ile de Thanet what dunces public servants are when it comes to doing a commercial deal.

With RAFLKMMTEMTSIA up for sale since March last year, what's the betting Thanet Council's cack-handed Chief Executive Sue McGonigal trumpets a fabulous deal in the next few weeks to buy the £4m-a-year lossmaker for a bargain £3.4m, thus saving the twelve jobs at stake?!?!!!!?!!!

Click here to read about the latest BMJ report on aircraft noise.
Click here to read about Infratil's sale of Prestwick to the Jocks.

Cheap As Hips

I suppose with a large elderly population here on the Ile de Thanet, there's fierce competition in the private medical sector. I wonder if there's a discount for getting both done at the same time? Or all three, if you're Jake the Peg.

If I was an octogenarian with a gammy leg, I'd jump at the offer. Well, after the op that is!

Hangover

Yurgh! I'm feeling a trifle delicate this morning. I blame a certain local brewer. Well, no, that's not fair really. After all, he wasn't the idiot who poured eight pints down the old Eastcliff gullet. No, that was me.

Thanks to everyone involved in putting on such a splendid bash at the bandstand yesterday. And apologies to everyone I bored with my latest gut-busting joke about the trainee psychic who packed it in because he couldn't see a future in it. Somehow it doesn't seem quite as amusing this morning.

Thanet Is Bad For Your Health - Official!

Holy heart by-passes! The latest NHS snapshot on the health of the nation makes for scary reading for those of us who live in the tip of Kent. Here's what it says about us Thanetians:

· Life expectancy is increasing, but on average, men and women in Thanet can expect to live shorter lives than in England. (Yikes!).
· Teenage pregnancy rates are high compared to the England average. (Cripes!)
· The rate of reported violent crime is higher than England. (Do you Wantsum???)
· Estimated smoking rates and death rates from smoking are both high. Early death rates from cancer are also higher than the England average. Levels of healthy eating, physical activity and adult obesity are similar to national levels. (Shurely shome mishtake? - Ed) However binge drinking is estimated to be below the England average (because we're all permanently stocious, one assumes). More people are admitted to hospital in Thanet for alcohol specific conditions than the England average. Both the percentage of people with recorded diabetes and the rate of people claiming sickness benefit because of mental health problems are high compared to England. (Blimey!)

That's it, I'm off to Tunbridge Wells, where:

· Life expectancy is increasing and is above the average life expectancy for England. There are differences in life expectancy between income groups. (Hurrah!)
· Although the death rate from smoking is low, smoking accounts for around 150 deaths every year. Early death rates from heart disease and stroke are low compared to England. (Yippee!)
· Lifestyles are comparatively healthy with estimated binge drinking and smoking rates below the England average. The land required to support an average resident’s lifestyle in Tunbridge Wells is greater than the average for England (ecological footprint). Although the percentage of people with recorded diabetes in Tunbridge Wells is lower than the England average, over 3,200 people are recorded as having diabetes. (I can live with that!)

Report on BBC website.
NHS Community Health Profiles.