Manston Pickle

You know me, I'm not one of those swivel-eyed rabble-rousers who's prone to posting controversial stuff in the hope of whipping up the lethargic locals into a state of revolutionary frenzy.

But no less an organ than the British Medical Journal has just reported a link between aircraft noise, especially at night, and the risk of heart disease and death from stroke. The report confirms what other studies have found, including one large-scale German analysis that concluded there was a 66% increased risk of heart attacks in men, and a whopping 139% increased risk in women, should knackered old jumbos be whining over your bonce while you're trying to get a bit of the old shut-eye.

I've run those odds past Cyril, my bean counter (he's a whizz with an Excel spreadsheet), and apparently that means there's a statistical chance of everyone in Ramsgate being dead by next Tuesday, should RAF London Kent Manston Margate Tracey Emin Maggie Thatcher Schipol International Airport decide to bust the toothless no night flights ban, which, er, it already does anyway.

Meanwhile Manston's bosses Infratil have been on a shindig to Shanghai, where they've decided to offload their other UK loss-making lump, Glasgow Prestwick Airport, onto the poor old Scottish taxpayer. You'd hope they'd be paying Lexy Salmon and his kilted crew to take it off their hands, but we all know from recent experience here on the Ile de Thanet what dunces public servants are when it comes to doing a commercial deal.

With RAFLKMMTEMTSIA up for sale since March last year, what's the betting Thanet Council's cack-handed Chief Executive Sue McGonigal trumpets a fabulous deal in the next few weeks to buy the £4m-a-year lossmaker for a bargain £3.4m, thus saving the twelve jobs at stake?!?!!!!?!!!

Click here to read about the latest BMJ report on aircraft noise.
Click here to read about Infratil's sale of Prestwick to the Jocks.

Election Fever

So far only the LibDems, UKIP and the British Nazi Party have poked their election literature through the letterbox here at the old CTM.

The similarity between what UKIP are flogging and the BNP's strident shite is striking. Whilst Nigel Farage's lot have gone for well-known former UKIP leader Winston Churchill on the front cover (whatever happened to that mahogany-stained ex-TV presenter who used to be in charge?), the white supremacists feature a cuddly, Anglo-Saxon family alongside a suitably sepia-ed Spitfire and the slogan 'The NEW Battle for Britain'. I have to say, in purely literal terms, the BNP's message is the more positive: 'YES to putting British People First', contrasted with UKIP's 'SAY NO to European Union'.

Meanwhile, the LibDems showcase a totally faceless gimp in a suit cosying up to a couple of unknown, middle-aged harridans dressed in what I like to refer to as 'Human Resources mufti'. All three are grinning like loons. Presumably this is the LibDems' idea of what the average British family looks like these days, viz one gay guy and his bull dyke flatmates. Typically, they have a less than catchy slogan: 'Britain and our neighbours - stronger together, poorer apart'.

So far nought from the Blue, Red or Green Rinsers. No doubt it's on its way. Of course, these guys are after our Eurovotes on 4 June, but here in the Cannes of Kent we have two other elections occurring simultaneously, namely county council and teeny-tiny council. I look forward to seeing what the Ramsgate First And Only candidate, Gerry O'Ramsgate, has to say. My only recollection of his policies is that he favours marked out parking spaces over residents' permits as a solution to the East Cliff's congested streets, on the basis that it would prevent confused and hormonal lady drivers from taking up too much room. Clearly going for the female vote there, eh Gerry!