Eastern Eggs

It's a four day weekend coming up! Hurrah! Hopefully we'll get lots of lovely visitors cramming down here to the far eastern tip of Kent to enjoy all the superduper stuff we've got going on, as well, of course, as our gorgeous seascape, architecture, nosh and booze.

To that end, I've updated my What's On In Thanet guide in the sidebar on the right. If you're on a smartphone, you'll have to click on 'view web version' to see that. To be frank it's not as comprehensive as it once was, given that the Visit Thanet website has improved over the years and is now pretty kushti. So apols if your particular shindig has been left out.

Also in my sidebar is my Recommended Nosheries column. This, er, needs a bit of updating, especially the Margate and Broadstairs sections.

I'll be tooling around the towns over the Easter break to sample the delights of the island's eateries, and reporting back. So restaurant owners beware! Prime cuts only please - no fingers in pies!! And if any of you lovely readers have any grubby experiences to report, do drop me a line in the comments section below.

As ever, I like to promote Ramsgate over Margate, especially given all the public dosh that's been spent attracting tourists to the north side at the expense of the south side over the past few years. So I'm pleased to announce that the Millionaires' Playground can now boast a new museum and gallery to equal the Turnip Contemporary! Step forward The Micro Museum, which boasts a collection of computers, electronics and video games from the 1970s, 80s and 90s. What with that and our Pinball Museum, all we need now is a glass eye collection and the tourists will be flocking!

Haha, no, only kidding. Ramsgate is a great place to visit, and this will be the first Easter for a century during which the happy holidaymakers won't be deafened by knackered old jumbos dive-bombing their barnets.

Still, the powers-that-be have done their best to put the mockers on it all, what with giving us concrete piles and now a burst main poo-drain down on the port, near, appropriately enough, the fart farms. It's not the first, and almost certainly not the last time Southern Water has treated us to this shower of proverbial during the summer season. Crimminy!

Right! I'm off to stuff some carbs in ahead of the Planet Thanet Beer Festival, which kicks off tomorrow. It'll be the ninth year in a row that I've sampled the delights of 180 real ales, then suffered the torture of beer-a-rear for the following week. To be honest, it's not been the same since it moved from Thanet's premier town to Margate Winter Gardens after the first year, but with Wetherspoons now looking like the faves to revamp Ramsgate's Royal Pavilion who knows, next year we could be welcoming the beardy beer imbibers back - to the biggest pub in Britain! Pip pip!

Ramsgate Prices Soar As Airport Plummets

By Isle of Thanet Gazunder Property Editor Sammy Detached

House prices in Ramsgate are surging following the news that Manston Airport is to close.

Estate agents throughout the town have reported a 'tidal wave' of interest in Ramsgate's Georgian and Victorian properties now that the blight of all-night flights, cargo planes carrying rotten bananas and endless training loops by knackered old jumbos has been lifted.

One agent, who didn't want to be named, said: 'Whilst it's obviously bad news for the half a dozen people who worked at Manston, there is an upside. We're getting property inquiries from as far away as Scotland from buyers who have heard the news and are now actively seeking to relocate in our fantastic seaside town.'

One local property expert told the Gazunder that he now expects well-presented homes to double or even triple in value over the next five years. 'It's going to be a new gold rush,' he said, adding: 'I've always maintained that Ramsgate would take off once the take-offs stopped taking off, if you see what I mean.'

Meanwhile redundant airport workers are being urged to 'get on their bikes' and look for work at one of the twelve other airports in the south east. Said one recruitment specialist: 'If you want to work at an airport, stop moaning and move to where there is one.'

That's enough property news - Ed.

Property News

Thinking of selling up and leaving this dump? Then who better to consult than Thanet's leading estate agents, Lovetts?!

And at the moment they're running a special promotion - they'll sell your cliff top mansion for only 1% commission (+ VAT)!

Why not tool along to their website? Or give them a call on 01843 570305. But don't forget to tell them The Daily Thanet sent you!

NB: The fact that Lovetts are now co-sponsoring this blog, having left a substantial sum in a manilla envelope under a lobster pot in the inner harbour, has had no influence on the content of this post.

Who Wants To Be A Pavilionnaire?

I don't!

But after five years of neglect and dereliction, there now appears to be competition for the honour of owning the lease on the Royal Victoria Pavilion, one of the tryptic of tragic eyesores on Ramsgate's dilapidated front (the other two being Pleasurama and the old Motor Museum. Oh, and our deserted port! Er, that's four.)

I was the first to suggest, back in 2008, that Wetherspoons should take it over (click here to read the story), when Rank scarpered to their current shed out at Westwood Cross. And now it seems my plan is coming to fruitation, with The Duffers extending the lease to 100 years to accommodate J D and his crew.

But wait! Coming up the rear is the lovely Emma Doherty-Irvine, the owner of several successful seaside rental properties here in the Millionaires' Playground, which attract thousands of visitors to the town every year. Her plan is to use the Pav more as a community space with food stalls and a market, along the lines of London's thriving Borough Market.

Emma is a highly motivated, young, Irish architect who is currently in the early stages of turning Albion House, here on the East Cliff, into a boutique hotel. She seems to have the knowledge, drive, and, most importantly, access to the financial backing to make things happen (it'll take millions to tart the place up). She fronted the film for Ramsgate's bid to win a portion of the Portas Town Team money last year, take a look...

So which horse to back? The decision will be crucial for the future of Ramsgate. Lord knows, we don't want to end up with another Royal Sands on our hands! Look what happened there, with TDC backing Tiny Terry's lame Swiss horse as if it was the only nag in town!

I'm not knocking Wetherspoons, they seem to have a tremendous track record when it comes to tarting up old buildings, they have the sponds, and Frank Thorley could certainly do with some competition. But they only want two-thirds of the building, and as far as I know there's no mention of using the rest for community space. And what if they do a runner in ten years time, like Rank?

Then there's the question of whether we need more 'community space'? Surely that's what that nice Dr Who lady is proposing for the old Motor Museum up on the grimy West Cliff? Kuh! I dunno!

Anyway, make your own mind up. You can watch Emma's very thoughtful presentation by clicking here, and take a gawp at her Facebook page here. Then vote in my 7 day poll on the right!

Any Portas In A Storm

Holy shop fronts! I see those splendid chaps at Ramsgate Arts have popped out a quickie in a bid to get my old retailing chum Mary Portas down to the Tip of Kent to display her sexy undercrackers in some of our knackered old units.

I must say, I think they've made the Millionaires' Playground look just the ticket for a Harvey Nics! Take a squiz and see what you think...

Tiptoe Through The Poo Tips

Now that I've recovered somewhat from the jet lag, I thought I'd take an inaugural toddle around the Millionaires' Playground. As I weaved past the thawing dog nuts and piles of uncollected rubbish on the pavements, a familiar feeling came over me.

On the one hand the startling beauty and setting of this town in the magic hour when the sun's setting can still take my breath away, just like the first time I clapped eyes on it all those years ago. Indeed, you could see it in the eyes of the hoards of newcomers who were strolling along the prom. You can spot them by the wistful glint as they survey their new manor, and the fact that they've not been dressed from a skip. They've been lured here, no doubt, by the new high speed train link (posters for which have sprung up everywhere in my absence), the Regency and Victorian properties at knock down (before they fall down) prices and the wondrous Thanet coastscape.

Only this week, Ramsgate was yet again named, along with Plymouth, as a national property hotspot, just as it was at the end of 2005, prompting my move here and spawning these feeble jottings, now in their fifth inglourious year. But after five years, the scales have well truly fallen from my eyes, the barker's nest on the cake being our local administration, guided, as it is, by lacklustre, dimwitted yokels who'd roll their trouser leg up and sell their granny, along with a free tube of KY, if there was a quick buck to be made.

But it's not all bad news. Ramsgate Council and the Eastcliff Residents' Association (of which I have never been a member, and of which I am never likely to be now they've had some sort of palace coup and a website revamp which has deleted the link to the eponymous area's most famous resident) have both come up with retorts to the Duffers' planning consultation which goes as far as they can in saying 'up yours' to the airport without being accused of stifling the (non-existent) 'jobs effect' so often touted by its supporters. Remember, more than a decade ago they were promising 10,000 jobs. So far it's created less than 100.

Back to that property report, and one of the stated reasons for Ramsgate being touted as a speculators' paradise is the new (also non-existent) fast ferry link to Boulogne. I see our local good egghead and biblio-bloke Michael Child has been blowing the whistle on this. Well, he may say that, but I couldn't possibly comment, still being held to ransom as I am by the putative operators. Suffice it to say that Visit Britain (the British Tourist Board in old money) thinks they've been running since 14 November (see link below), and that's good enough for me.

Even the high speed trains hardly covered themselves in glory, I hear, during the Big Snow of 2009. As I've been writing this, the sun's gone down, and the tracksuited youths are marching up and down outside, threatening to set fire to a discarded estate agent's sign that's cluttering up the pavement. Oh dear, I feel the old cynicism creeping over me again!

Southeastern high speed trains
Ramsgate tipped as property hotspot on email4property.co.uk
Ramsgate to be 'millionaires' playground' (from 2006)
Latest on fast ferry to Boulogne on Thanetonline
Visit Britain's quarterly update (pdf download)

Ramsgate Under The Hammer

A big, ECR shout out to reader Caroline who spotted Ramsgate on the BBC's Homes Under The Hammer today. Caroline must be a fellow welfare sponger (although perhaps not with the political axe to grind) as HUTH is a morning show primarily watched by the kind of people who might be fragile enough at that early hour to take its title literally, given a probable diet consisting solely of cheese sarnies, disco biscuits and White Lightning. In fact, judging by the state of the property featured, it could well have already suffered that fate!

Anyhoo, back to the show. Presenter Martin kicked off the Ramsgate segment with an upbeat monologue: 'There's a real positive feeling about the stuff that's been going on here. There's a new high speed rail link into London and a lot of property refurbishment going on.' That's the spirit, Martin! Once inside the house in Richmond Road, however, he ascertained that all the floors had collapsed and the entire house was in imminent danger of falling down. Hmm, more than a spot of refurbishment required there, methinks. Auctioneers Clive Emson eventually, er, knocked it down to a London developer for £142,000, who then discovered Thanet Council had condemned it. But not to worry, a man from TDC eventually came along and offered him a £75,000 interest free loan. Result!

Click here to watch Homes Under The Hammer (until 9 July)

Ramsgate Property Goes Through The Roof

by Isle of Thanet Gazunder Property Editor Brickson Mortar

Ramsgate has come top of the seaside property league in a recent survey by the Halifax Building Society. According to the society's number-crunchers, homes in Ramsgate have increased in value by nearly 40% over the past three years, the highest increase in the whole of the south east.

And in the past year, the isle's premier town has only been pipped by Burnham on Crouch and Margate (Can we leave that out? - Ed.)

A spokesman for the Halifax told the Gazunder: 'Whilst other seaside towns across the UK have done better, as far as the south east is concerned Ramsgate was certainly the place to buy three years ago. Unfortunately now it's dear as poison so our advice is to flog granny's bungalow while the going's good, and p*ss off to Bulgaria'. (Shurely shome mishtake? - Ed.)

Ramsgate: bloody expensive

Ramsgate Property Nicer Than Margate

According to my counterstateriserometer, a reader in Suffolk landed here earlier this morning by asking Google the following question: 'Property Margate or Ramsgate Nicer'?

So, on the off chance that they should return, and as part of my duty in providing a public service, here's some property in Ramsgate:

And here's some property in Margate: