Showing posts with label Davros undercarriages. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Davros undercarriages. Show all posts

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Hell's Grannies


News that a 107 year old woman from Tunbridge Wells has done the ton around Brands Hatch in a Beemer won't surprise us Thanetians. The number of superannuated old nannas you see whizzing around like decapitated daleks in these parts beggars belief. And that's just in the aisles at Waitrose!

It reminds me of a story my Ramsgate optician told me the other day when I went to get the old glass eye checked out. Apparently he'd recently attended to a wizened crone who'd never had an eye test before. Gobsmacked that she could even see her way into the shop, let alone pilot a vehicle on Her Majesty's highways, he tentatively asked her if she drove. 'Oh yes, I have done for years,' came the response. 'Well, how on earth can you see the other vehicles and pedestrians?' asked the eye quack, jaw by now on terra firma. 'Oh, I can't,' said the old gipper. 'The Lord Jesus Christ is my guide.'

I can tell you that if it had been me, I would have reached for the wooden stake and mallet there and then!

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Private Functions Catered For

My very old chum Angina took a tumble from his Davros undercarriage on Sunday, and was admitted to the QEQM for observation.

He'd been to the 80s night at the Boredstares Pav, as is his wont, and had been careering home up the High Street in, er, very high spirits when the wheels came off. That's what he says anyway.

He's just phoned to ask if I can come and pick him up from the Discharge Lounge. Just like the old bugger to have headed straight for a club in Margate!