Breast Implants Caused Manston Radar Boob

by Isle of Thanet Gazunder Beauty Correspondent Piers D'Nipple

A Manston firefighter has claimed her boob job joy turned to misery when it caused radar at Kent International Airport to malfunction.

The firefighter, who asked not to be named, says the problem only came to light when air traffic controllers spotted a pair of giant bosoms on their screens, heading for Ramsgate. She told The Gazunder: 'I was off duty at the time and enjoying my new bust. But then I got a call from the airport on my mobile to say there was an emergency, and to prepare for a pollution incident as they thought the two enormous, flying breasts might be leaking contaminated milk.'

She added that it was only when she was preparing to dash to the airport that she realised her new 36Ds could be causing the problem. 'I called the control tower back and they asked me to jiggle them around a bit. Sure enough, they were jiggling around on their radar screens too!'

The emergency services were stood down once the source of the blips was identified.

A spokesman for the airport said: 'I know we have our knockers, but this is ridiculous.'

Whitney Boob

Did anyone else see Whitney Houston nearly fall out of her dress live on X Factor at the weekend? It was almost a Judy Finnigan moment. She looked a bit whacked out too, but we are told she has put all that behind her.

The gorgeous Dermot O'Leary recovered the situation well though, I thought. Someone told me he has a place in Ramsgate. Now that's one Ramsgatonian I wouldn't mind bumping into on a dark night ;-) Sxx.

You Need Hands

My thanks to regular contributor Mr X for pointing me in the direction of this clip from BoobTube. Media trainers will tell you that it's important not to distract from your message by using too many hand gestures when you're delivering a presentation. Here former US Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld demonstrates just how it shouldn't be done!