Down From Hackney

(With apologies to Chas & Dave)

Well now I've got that lottery grant from The Tate
To fund my installation down in Margate
I'm gonna blow the cash tomorrow, a site-specific plot
We'll catch the fast train, don't be late, we'll be there on the dot

Get the Earl Grey ready, Victoria, 'cos we're coming...

Down from Hackney
Don't forget the Fairtrade espresso and soya milk
Down from Hackney
With my friends from Hoxton and everyone of that ilk
Down from Hackney
We'll see the Turner, discern an earner by the sea
Down from Hackney
You can keep your chips and cockles
We're above the usual grockles
'Cos we're down from Hackney
Alex, Josh, Arthur and me!

Along the prom we'll try to get granola
And shun the arcades, bingo and Mazola
The kids will all enjoy themselves on their iPads and phones
And look at all the chavs and sigh with patronising groans

Behave yourself Noah, or I'll block your iTunes account

Down from Hackney
Don't forget to put it on Tumblr, Twitter and blogs
Down from Hackney
We'll be wearing O'Neill wetsuits over our togs
Down from Hackney
We'll buy a pulled pork, sour dough sandwich for our tea
Down from Hackney
You can keep Shoreditch and Stokie
From now on they're much too low key
'Cos we're down from Hackney
Alex, Josh, Arthur and me!