New Paper

It's here - the very first edition of your super, soaraway yourthanet! I picked this up from a pile in the corner of the corner shop this morning. Published by those nice people at Kent on Sunday, yourthanet imaginatively styles itself The newspaper for Margate, Ramsgate, Broadstairs and district.

As you can see, the front page splashes drooping fortunes at Pfizer, our local Viagra manufacturer, whose lead has definitely fallen out of its pencil. Mind you, the writing was already on that particular wall back in December. The paper's nicely laid out, with the usual KOS mix of style, celebrity, and a little bit of news thrown in. There's even a 'mystery blogger' who does a passable but ultimately unconvincing imitation of yours truly. All wrapped around the meat in the sandwich - reams and reams of ads for property and cars.

My old mate Frank appears to be a big fan, judging by the number of pages he's taken out. In fact local bigwigs have flocked to congratulate KOS on the launch. Among the twittering stars in Thanet's firmament to append their best wishes are Sir Roger Wind, Dr Steve Ladychap, and our glorious council leader Sandy Beach, who, with no sense of irony whatsoever, given the story on page 5 which details Margate traders at their wits' ends over the closure of the Dreamland cinema ('There's nothing left here'), kicks off his spiel with: 'People and businesses are upbeat and they talk about the opportunities that are available.' Constant plugs, too, for yourkenttv, a pallid version of my own ECR TV surrounded by annoying ads.

Oh well, it's bound to be ludicrously lucrative, and will certainly give Sadscene a run for its money, if not the Gazunder itself. Now, all I need is a silly name for it. Anyone for yawnthanet?

Update: Kent County Council's TV offering, due to launch on 21st September courtesy of 1.6m of your council tax pounds, is now running a promo on its website. Typically for a made in Maidstone production, their opening gambit is: 'Kent TV, coming soon from Maidstone, Canterbury, Faversham, Tunbridge Wells, Dover, Whitstable!' Not a dickie bird about the 127,000 souls who live in Kent's East End.

Honestly, next time my council tax demand arrives, I'm seriously contemplating posting the cheque to Lille.