Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Hello, Hello, I'm Back Again!

And living in Cliftonville. Or Ramsgate. Or Herne Bay. Take your pick.

Well, it took a long, expensive lunch and several bottles of Australian Leg Opener to persuade Samantha to hand over the password to my blog. Apparently she thought it would be amusing to kill me off. Hmm. Not sure I was particularly amused by that. She also seems to have gone a little power crazy during her tenure, and taken the opportunity to toy with the immense kudos and influence that running Thanet's Premier Blog confers. She's not all bad, though, and has offered to make it up by buying me a pair of elasticated trousers at Westwood Cross tomorrow. I've, er, put on a bit of weight since I was immobilised.

But the enforced break (courtesy of a Pole in a Peugeot) has given me cause to look deep into myself, and, to be honest dear reader, I haven't liked what I've seen. For too long now I've been using my enormously superior wit and intellect to bully and berate the little people. The little people who live on the north of the island. This really isn't fair. They are, for the most part, poorly educated and feeble minded, and deserve our sympathy more than our scorn.

So from now on you'll be seeing a shiny, new Dick. An upstanding Dick, with two great, weighty appendages - responsibility and respect.

Nah, on second thoughts that sounds like a load of bollocks to me! Now, have I told you about the Boredstares bar owner who gets his kicks by dressing up in ladies' undercrackers?!?!

18 comments:

Unknown said...

Great to have you back with us.
I think that woman was taking advantage of your good nature.

An admirer said...

Thank goodness!

Anonymous said...

Welcome back, Richard. Back from the dead, seemingly.

Anonymous said...

Some hard hitting stories please, such as why does Brian White gets paid £125,000 pa, in Thanet, for presiding over a department that delivers fuck all.

Anonymous said...

7:38
you don't know the half of it mate?

The Mears affair and non payment of the military arches by a Cllr is insignificant with what's been happening elsewhere? if you add into this mix that a Cllr did not sign his resignation letter and the mistake that the same Cllr attend a meeting when he was elsewhere indicates that TDC is not a shining example of local authority leadership at all?

What is clear mate - other external agencies are protecting TDC....why?

Anonymous said...

Too many sticky financial fingers in too many messy pies perhaps?

Anonymous said...

Fantastic news ! I thought her blog was for real the other evening ! I almost cried, mind you that could have been the amount of wine consumed.

Now lets have a great catch up of all the oddgoings.

Anonymous said...

Get on with it! like the caravan planning permission that was not recommented by officers but passed, like where's the Euroferry terminus, like KCC pinching East Kent grammar school places and moving them to West Kent. Next they will be digging up the Thanet Way and relaying it in Royal Tunbridge Wells.

Peter C said...

The caravan park is a GOOD thing (there's plenty of golf courses we can dig up if we need more farm land), as is the continued investment in the airport. You lot are all doom & gloom, try being more positive.

Anonymous said...

if everyone walked around naked listening to crap music, build on green belt land, fly planes over the top of it and we have Peter's utopia.

Peter C said...

Hahaha, you've just made me spit my tea over the computer!!!

Anonymous said...

Well cllr Poole is concerned that rules have been broken regarding the caravan park. To quote:-

"My concern is councillors may have colluded to predetermine the application. It’s against local planning policies and substantially the same as the previous application, which was refused."

Unknown said...

Never mind Australian leg opener it should have been British Gob Stopper!

Most unfunny "joke"
Delighted you are back where you belong.

Richard Eastcliff said...

Are you suggesting I should have slapped her in the chops, Andrea? That would probaby have landed me in trouble with the rozzers!

Unknown said...

Am sure you would never do something so ungentlemanly!
Gob stopper as in the sweet.
Cheaper than Australian leg collapser too!

Richard Eastcliff said...

Ah, all is clear now Andrea! But as she was in fact typing away on my blog willy-nilly, perhaps the best thing to have done would have been to buy her a pair of mittens and gaffer tape them on!

Anonymous said...

Glad you are back - we need some more muscle behind us - all those who have been off the air - Bertie Biggles as well - keep these crooks who call themselves Conservatives on their toes !?
Nevermind the incompetent executives who call themselves TDC.
Now KCC thinks we dont have high enough IQ in this part of kent to warrant Grammar school place nos?!

Anonymous said...

KFC are rite about the grammer skools!